Classic Plastic Aug 2010

Classic Plastic by Cooper St. James
Cooper host Random Acts of Radio… first Sunday 7PM on WLUW. Chicago’s longest running and only all audio documentary program.

I was gonna wait until you were a bit older to tell you this…but since I have you here I guess now’s the best time..I have been keeping a secret from you! No, I wasn’t born in a cross fire hurricane…although I bet you wish I was indeed. The secret is that when it comes to collecting albums and keeping that whole living, breathing and begging collection in shape…(the kinda shape that would make your fair weather friends green with envy)…I have developed a secret acronym to remember….this is for you Poindexter, an acronym! It goes like this…..

Just remember… R. O .C. K.

R…. stands for Record Management. You got this great collection, but you are gonna need to take care of it…..for as you know it will take care of you later down the road. Get your kool self a room or area of your compound that has zero direct light and is somewhat climate controlled. Albums are fragile, made out of semi-organic materials and they are not getting any younger! Keep your records away from direct light, heaters, vents and radiators. Simply put… heat will warp those vinyl disks quickly and direct sun will definitely fade them there covers. You surely don’t want to reach for your Big Brother and the Holding Company’s Cheap Thrills and find that cuz somebody (YOU) left it by a radiator and/or direct sunlight for the last few years ...now its more warped and faded than your Uncle Hal (you know Hal...the one that dodged the draft…not the Hal on your mother’s side...he’s cool)

O....Organize…..the most classic rule of thumb is this…Alphabetize groups by first names and artist by last names. So you know… this is the standard around the world. If we all can remember this the next time I am at your crib and need to impress your mom’s bridge club with my knowledge of Burt Bacharach…I can find it. However, if you are my friend Dave (who has over 2500 albums) then don’t put them in any order….! Sadly, this leaves your guest searching high and low for say …Norman Greenbaum’s Spirit in the Sky…..with all that dead air…who’s got time for that?

We tease Dave that he keeps Greenbaum in the O’s… for Outta sight, man!

C...is for Clean…and let’s keep it that way. Get in the habit of using your brush before each play. There are many types of brushes on the market…doest matter which one you use…just use one! While we are at it… try to handle these things by the outer edges only….Please!! Also, and so you know… distilled water and a damp rag can help with more stubborn issues…..the alcohol based cleaners work well too…but may disappear if Uncle Hal is visiting.

K… is for Kicking out the jams!! After you get these records stored, organized and cleaned…put the show on the road, baby! Fire up that turkey, Turkey!! You got’em for a reason and now you shall turn it to 11! (How many months did you think would go by… before I pulled that one out? If your keeping score that’s two Spinal Tap references this summer alone). For me there just aint nothing worse than a krazy kat that has a dandy great collections and doesn’t regularly listen to it. Dig deep…stay thirsty…Share it, clean it, take care of it and turn it up loud, man!! ….Cha Cha and Cha ..
(P.S. Next month we should talk about handling neighbors that like to complain)